homo crudelis

I think everyone has lived, at one time or another, under the misguided idea that they are special. That they were different than others and were destined for great things. It is a common fantasy when we are growing up… call it the “Harry Potter” syndrome. For women, it is the princess fantasy or worse, the “amelie” fantasy.

It kills me to think people are so fucking out of touch with their own self worth that they have to fantasize about a life that they will never have just to validate their existence. I mean, it is one thing to wish that you were interesting, but it is another thing all together to pretend outwardly that you are special.

The argument can be made that just by fantasizing about this alternate reality, you are just like every other pathetic cocksucker out there. As the saying goes, “yeah, you’re special… just like everyone else.”

When I was really young (5-8) though, I had a sneaking suspicion that I WAS different… but I didn’t go out and tell people, “I’m special! I am different than you!” It just reeks of low self opinion and even I, at that tender age knew that. Yet, at 43 I still run into grown ass adults who think they are special… the amelies, the princesses, the geniuses, the fame whores… I wonder what sort of early life experiences lead these people to crave attention or admiration so much, that they live their lives in a state of constant denial and fantasy.

Irony Alert: I realize simply by having a blog, there is a certain amout of hipocrisy going on here. While I admit that having a public forum with which to voice my opinions, I too crave certain amount of validation. But here is the difference, and it is subtle: The validation I crave is my own. Anyone else is just white noise. I know my worth and I know the price I pay to be the way I am. I really couldn’t care less what anyone else thinks about me.

I don’t really work to publicize this blog. The few people who read regularly are welcome friends who share common thoughts or traits… the random idiots who wander by, post once are the ones I am truly fascinated by.

Anyway, the reason why I am writing this is because I have been thinking a great deal lately about evolution. “What the fuck does evolution have to do with any of this?” you might ask. Well, here is the thing. Based on the opinions scientists, on average, evolutionary peaks happen every 50,000 years and paleontologist Stephen J. Gould said that “there’s been no biological change in humans for 40,000 or 50,000 years.”  If that is true, and there is no reason to believe that it isn’t, humans are due for some form of evolutionary leap.

My guess is that the evolutionary leap won’t be similar to the X-Men comic where mutants become super heroes. Instead, I believe the next evolutionary leap will be about human emotions. I believe that human evolution will eventually rid us of emotions. Homo crudelis, or cold hearted man. A being completely free from the handicap on emotions playing a role in his decision making.

Now I’m no expert, but doesn’t that sound familiar to you?