Statham’s imdb.com profile, collectively, is a promise to you, the weary filmgoer. It’s a promise that says, “I promise that you will not FOR ONE SECOND be bored during one of my movies. You won’t learn shit about the human condition, or feel a collective connection with the brotherhood of man. But if you give me $10, I will fuck an explosion while a Slayer song plays”. – patton oswalt
I don’t think I have read a funnier piece in the last year. I have very little knowledge of this Patton Oswalt character, but the fucker is funny. Of course, nothing he writes in this post on his myspace page is untrue. Jason Statham is the second coming of Christ on a Cheez-It.
3 thoughts on “gay-tham for statham”
That is absolutely hilarious. I love Statham. Crank is one of my current favorites, and I loved him in the Guy Ritchie flick Snatch.
Jason is AWESOME.
Snatch was great for two reasons – him and Brad Pitt as the Pikey(I think that’s the spelling). I love the scenes where those two talk – well, Brad talks and Jason struggles to understand what the hell he’s saying.
Crank 2 looks like it’s going to be absolutely hilarious and a totally fun ride.
Back in the late 80s, early 90s Bruce Willis was the goto guy for testosterone-fueled blood orgies on celluloid. As Bruce has spent the better part of the new millenium seeking “respectable” work in movies he feels will garner an oscar nod (laughable, but true), Jason Statham swooped in low and fast and absconded with the title of “man e would gladly pay to watch rocking in a chair on stage.”
Crank was incredible simply because of the sheer joy one gets from witnessing all that kickassery (word pending copyright) crammed into just under 90 minutes of celluloid.
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