Inherently Different

Housing 101

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This is Charley Young Beach in Kihei. This particular beach is one of my favorite beaches on the entire island of Maui. Mostly because that it is relatively secluded and few tourists frequent its pristine shoreline. Also, it doesn’t have the sewage problems that many of the beaches on the southside of the island have. … Read more

Kihei, HI 96753

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I’ve been here since Thursday. I’ve had intermittant internet access for a few days but to be honest, these people seem to be stuck in a time warp. You can’t possibly image how hard it is to find high-speed access on this island. I finally had to discuss the situation with a local I-Net provider. The conversation went something like this…
ME: So, high-speed for your company means any connection that’s 56K or better?
Local Internet Guy (LIG): Bruddah. You on Maui now, yeah? You on island time now, yeah?
ME: What the holy kamole does that mean?
LIG: You be patient, yeah?
ME: Look, you promised me that I could get access in 24 hours or less.
LIG: 24 Hour long time bruddah. Long time on da island, yeah?
ME: What the fuck you keep saying “Yeah” after every fucking sentence? Are you retarded?
[click]

Apparently, they don’t like it when you cuss at them. I think he’s sending over a few pipe-hitting Somoans on over to hammer me into a bag of poi with the DSL Modem. This island living thing might be really fun.

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Last Tango on Union

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It’s 10:30 pm on Wednesday and in less than 12 hours I’ll be living on Maui. I’ve got my bags & board packed, all my stuff stored and ready for shipping, and the Red Queen is now two weeks away from doing the very same. I just took a walk down the street to grab … Read more

Moving To Maui Goodbye Cocktail

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Time tends to fly when you’re building things. A case in point? It took 2 years to build the Eiffel Tower in Paris. On a more local level, it took over 4 years to build the Golden Gate Bridge and 5 years to complete the Trans America Pyramid. Granted, my life isn’t much in comparison … Read more

44 Lines About 22 People

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I’ve lived in the Bay Area for 12 years and in that time I’ve met a few people who have, for good or bad, changed me significantly. For the most part, the lessons learned have strengthened me in ways that would have been impossible without their participation. As I get ready to head into a new adventure, I’d like to formally acknowledge their participation in forming the person I am today.

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Aaaiiiiiieeeee!

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I can’t believe that this is even legal but a company is developing a technology that would pre-edit DVDs that have questionable language or visuals. According to industry reports, ClearPlay lets an adult watch an R-rated film like Gladitor with all the violence, nudity and language edited out. Which means that you can teach your … Read more

The Courtney of Popular Opinion

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Love & Death is yet another in a long line of books that detail the insidious conspiracy that robbed the world of an influential musician who may or may not have spoken for a generation. Like other untimely deaths, Cobain’s apparent suicide didn’t sit well with his fans and spawned an industry of investigations into … Read more

Mother’s Day Gift Ideas

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I was innocently sitting here perusing the Maui News classifieds when a pop-up informed me that Mother’s Day is rapidly approaching. It prompted me to find a gift for “your type of Mom” which in turn prompted me to do a search for a severed horse’s head similar to the one featured prominently in The … Read more

The Day Draws Neigh

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Well, the day I leave for Maui is drawing nearer. I’m really excited and if it wasn’t for this miserable cold I’ve brought back from Guadalajara, I’d be much happier. Of course, having a cold in this kind of heat makes it even worse. Not that I’m complaining (well, ok, just a little bit) because … Read more

Stone Boy

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I’m not big on emotions. For the most part, I can do without them and don’t miss them much. I tend to live my life on a purely rational plane. Few things can make me exhibit emotional outbursts and unfortunately, I don’t react well with people who function on emotions. I won’t go as far … Read more